It's Christmas, Where is Everybody?

 It was pass 7 am when earth quake woke me up. My daughter and husband is in the living room watching Sesame street when I rushed towards them and quickly dress up so we can go down.

We always go down after earthquake to be safe in aftershock.

The sun was shining, got the opportunity to bask in it with my daughter. 

Flashback last night during the noche buena, it felt surreal having no family around just the two of us Jose and I eating alone, together. It was unusual to not have exchange gifts, variety of food and noisy family around. But that's our reality now, as we face the most difficult times ( the Covid time). We'd love to cook for family especially Jose, this time it's just us. We shared a two course meal - Seafood Marinara and Lechon (oven baked). We ate before even noche buena cause we are starving we havent had our lunch in 24th of the afternoon. He was busy sending parcels and buying groceries while I was the one who took care of Eloise. 

Baby and I bathe together, I fed her, we watch her favorite Sesame Street for a couple of minutes and we had short session of reading books and then finally I put her to sleep. Normally she sleeps around 8PM but now she can doze off of as early as 5PM. But even my daughter slept early on the 24th, I still waited for like hours before the meal is served. Famish, I savor the flavorful lechon and had 2 full rounds of Marinara haha!

Before that, we tried to bake ginger bread man. Man was I not ready , I made the design ridiculous - well just because there's no tool like icing to finish it off. But anyway I still "plan" to give it to family haha.

We'll in bisperas the pasko, hubby and I got cozy andmostly we spend the night together unbothered by the baby who's ofcourse ready to burst anytime. He mustered his strength to massage my legs but actually he still has to finish it of as in now (he's still PS4-ing).

So in the morning of the 25th, earthquake happened. Same routine, we went down to ease off aftershock then for a couple of mins we went back up again. So we had breakfast with the little one, she ate cerelac rice and soy mixed with Gerber Squash. Sorry anak, we havent had the time to really cook for fresh ulam with soft boild veggies for you, so so guilty anak as of writing this. But anyway, we had our siesta and when we woke up tatay (Jose) needed to go to eastwood to fix his ingrown and to hoard some stuffs for the baby (Chicco Sale). So when tatay left, we went down to the park, we took cuple of photo and videos together. We were there with a mum and like 2 year old boy. So as I stroll my baby, I noticed the surrounding is eerily quiet. I wonder where everyone went. Were they asleep because of last nights noche buena? Are we the only ones in this place, did they had their vacation in their provinces or some place else? I felt alone, though I'm with my daugther. This must be the most silent Christmas afternoon I've ever had. Simple and quite silenced. The place looked deserted and lonely. I thought I heard a Christmas song playing, well it's playing but I cant hear clearly what song it is. 

I guess this emotion came from the fact that we are all alone and somewaht sad of what's happned to us in year 2020. I feel threatened in every move. Praying that 2021 will bring us safety and peace of mind.

Happy Holidays..

 

Benicarlo Family

My Labor and Delivery Journey

Its almost 4 AM in the morning of Saturday, July 25 2020.

I just finished feeding my baby girl with 3 ounce breast milk which she did not finished because she was too sleepy (due to lack of sleep yesterday).

Im sneaked out to write this blogged that I might never ever begin in the near future if I wont do it now because you know moms, we are busy with our clingy baby all the time. By the way Franchesca is almost 2 months now she'll be turning 2 months this July 29 and Im wodesring which cake hould we buy this time. When she was 1 month, we bough Tous Les jours white chiffon cake with french macaroons only to dinf out it's a raibow cake that really doesnt taste good for me since it's too blant. Going back this blog is about my personal journey of Eloise's birth cause I dont want to forget it and some of the experiences I had along the way (before and after birth).

It was Friday noon when I was about to finish work. I am working from home like the rest of the world, yeah it's covid times and we are suppose to work from home to be safe. Even before that day, a bout the entire week I had this feeling that I am about to give birth since I already have inconsistent contractions. I was always talking to my daughter in the womb to stay put until my "sweldo" comes in so that we need not to worry to pay for the bills since I only saved up for normal delivery. And really even normal delivery cost fortune since it's pandemic times I have to pay for extras in the hospitals like the PPE that the doctors and nurses who are attending are going to wear, the covid swab test and all other precautions not to mention the car that we borrow (Kuya Qoaquin ate Mildred's wife who drove us back and forth - whom we are lucky enough to burrow since this pandemic had made them stopped working in GRAB) Going back, I was talking to my child to postpone it until the 30h and good enough my labor really pushed thru on the 29th which is Friday and as we all know if the sahod falls on Weekend and Monday they are going to be paid advance. So I was really so thankful to God and my baby for listening really. So I send the final email to my team mates that I think it's really is time to go to hospital and please pray for me since thats already 5PM (past 3Pm when they normally logged off, it just so happens that I need to do a lot of stuff other than work like admin papers for my maternity leave). On the side note I was really thankful to God and my HR ms Rom because in my company they will advance the 70k PHP from SSS (which will be credited when I passed the requirements with my child's birth certificate, which means I have to give birth first befire I can acquire the money but Fujixerox advanced it so I can use it in Hospital bils - My husband and his brother went to mcKinley to pickup the check prior that week making us at peace again that we have additional money for the hospital bills. Cause really that time we do not know how my birthing is going to end and so I really thought we need to be prepared for the worse.)

So after I sent the email, it was truly a painful labor that comes gradually like every 15 mins I guess. and prioer to that like thurs I already lost my mucus plug which means anytime that week I might give birth). Dra Dado, my OB replied to get myself in the hospital and we'll meet there. So I took a shower and woke up my sleeping husband told him that we need to go. Things are already prepared, we had our luggaed for an approximately 4-5 days stay in the hospital and we have our IDs ready. Kuya Qoaquin came just in time and we arrived at the hospital like 30 mins that was 5:30 to 6PM if I may recall. So we told kuya to wait if we have to go back home he is just there but if I am about to deliver then he can go home and just wait for our call for the next couple of days to fetch us. So my husband and I went straight to ER ( prior to that in entrance the triage gave us papers checking if we dont have fever, cough etc and also tested our body temperature thats just the way it is now in all establishments starting this pandemic) in ER I saw a father with his new born they were checking the bay while me and my husband were waiting to be accomodated - we sat on the bendh beside the nurse's station in ER. I asked if we need to tell them that I have HMO said no need since they arent going to do anything to me. So I just waited for the nurse to carry me thru wheel chair going to labor room. In labor room I was adviced to chnage to lab gown which was funny because Im too fat to fit my but crack open for the world to see. I was too afraid i might need to walk outside I told them I am going to remove my panty because guess what the Charmee that i bout in Lazda which I already knew wouldnt fit me couse it's size Large (I need XXL) broke it's side sticker. The nurse said it's alright to remove the undies. At first I felt uncomfortable because the niuse was like pushy but later on I felt comfortable with them. I was told to lie down in a room within labor room, they need to do cervical exam to know how much my cervix is dilated, they measured the CM and apparently Im already ikn active labor with 5CM opening. Blood flooded on the bed, nurse said my pain tolerance is strong since I am not reacting when she is inserting her finger. What I thought of that time is let's get it done I want to see my baby! Honestly it's nothing to fuss about I am not hurt or anything I spread like eagle and just want them to make it done. So I was told to lie in bed jut across that room. There where many nurse in the labor room, they handed my stuff to my husband - earings, clothes I was wearing a huge dress we bought in H&M Gateway and my Rosary. I would like my rosary to stay with me during the labor but it has metal on it and we are not allowed to carry anything with metal.
Told my husband that its okay to tell kuya Qoaquin to go home for now because I will deliver the baby today. My husband is a little bit tender that day, he's really tough on me but that day you can really tell from his voice that he is somewhat soft now sure how to to explain but maybe he is worried for our safety - thats on top of contracting COVID in hospital.

So then I was asked to lie down on delivery bed, across me was a woman also laboring I can tell it from the pain in her face. Mine, I survived basically by proper inhale exhale taught tome by my previous OB and ofcourse from youtubing (other moms advices in Vlogs). I saw tht clock it was 7PM and the nurse said they need to measure again that time Im already 7 CM, By 9PM Im already 10 CM. Ready for "normal delivery" well that was the initial plan.

When I was in bend during my 7CM, an aneasthesiologist sat beside me I was so realieved that she caress my shoulder and legs she knew I was in pain. she told me about the options like epidural for painless delivery. If I am not mistaken she said thera re types of epidurals, one is injected during labor when the babys head is already seen - eventually the labor pain will help me push the baby since she can see y pain tolerance is high, the other is epidurals will be given to me by shots but I wont feel much of the pain I can relax but the consequence is I might not feel the urge to push and the last one is they will inject the one that will make me as leep - that option I dont like but I did not know I will end up like that haha! So the time has come, my OB is in the house! They asked me if I already had my lunch or dinner told them not - they were ofering me the chicharon and we all luagh because the labor might take long and Im no longer allowed to drink and eat. Lucky enough my contractions are good, OB already gave me shots to have constant contractions. Around 9PM - I saw in clock I was brought to Labor room. Prior to that they injected me the epidurals as ordered by my OB - which was very difficult because I was laboring and the nurse who is strong built man carry me and made me sat in a concave postion so they can inject the epidurals in my back (spine section - but it wont be injected directly to my spine but near it as explained by the dra) a sticker in my back felt cold as it runs thru my entire back - she said it's the medicine. Its cold. After a few minutes it was able to blocke the pain and I was able to relax. I actually had a quick chat with the nurse as i couldnt feel the contractions anymore. So fast forward 9PM - my OB said we need to transfer to Delivery Room. Im already 10 cm when they measured. In Delivery room, it was like in the movie. Two nurses accompanied my delivery while the anesthesiology is on my head section. My OB is sitting on the left doing her social media, aint that cool - I was not woried infact we all laugh in delivery room cause I couldnt push enough I cant feel the urge and they said give it a push like you are having a big poop. But nothing happed, my baby wont come out. My Dra said it could be the cord and she didnt want to stress the baby. I was given an hour to make it but if not they need to ask my husband (which I was not informed that time that they already asked him that they will do a CS). So after an hour of ire ng ire, they put me in Operating Room, that made a lot of difference. They injected simthing that made me halucinate all I rememnred sayingwas " ang sarap sarap matulog, hindi ako nakakatulog buong week" only to know that all thourh out I was talking to Dra hhahahah! while she's doing the CS. anyway it took 3 hours daw to deliver the baby vi CS. And to confirm, it was infact the cords are entangled in my daughters neck, boy and legs. So the safest way out is really via CS - and I am grateful Dra made the decision and not wait for another minute to push via normal delivery cause it might affect my baby's health - I dont want to put my child in danger in any way so no matter how they want to deliver the baby as long as she is safe that is perfectly fine with me.

So when they are done, a Dr placed my beautiful baby in my chest and immediately Eloise latched! She sucked the milk in my breadt which I know I dont have pa before she was born. But low and behold they already produced milk! Also thankful that my baby knows how to latch, some babies or most of them are taught in the hospital as told by nurse. I was trying to see her face but couldnt because she was leaning down my boobs and I was quite drowsy. Oh I remebered when they moved us from Delivery room to operating room, my husband was there he was swaeting and he just said " Oh galingan mo ha, dito lang ako." was Sweet, DRA DAdo was saying o Kiss na haha Dont like!
So going back in operating room, we were moved to waiting room for some interview stuff before moving us finally in our room that's 105 I think. So my baby is still latched (knowing Eloises now she is really a milk monster, reason why she's really good at latching) There was a lap on our head which was meant to warm her, thats the time I saw her heavenly face but the spotlight is beaming, I tried to squint a couple of times to see her face it was so small good Lord! Finally after questionaing, the boy nurse pushed my bed to room whiile girl nurse was carrying my baby. That time I asked if I am going to be with my daughter, they said yes no more bursery (maybe because of new rules bright by pandemic) But it's on my advantage because I was able to nurse right after birth. I also asked my hsband to do a skin to skin, it was cold in our room but told him to removei stshirt and cary his daughter and it was everything. Going back they knocked in dark room, my husband was dozing off I guess, it's already2 AM in the morning. They said I delivered 11PM on May 29. So that was the first time I though my husband saw our baby, did not know again that he was called by Dra Dado to take a look at the baby right after it was removed from my womb. Dra is really a good dcotor, even my husband couldnt be there in delivery she made sure to take photos and accomodate my husband in showing our child.

With Dra Dado

Baby Franchesca Eloise and mama

So his face is beaming with light he was all smiles but you could tell from his face he also tired. I am thankful for Jose that he is who he is, I had no problems in the hospital he was the one doing everything even helping me with earing my panties and cleaning the baby's poop.

So from time to time a nurse knocks on our door to inject, give medicine, food, check for our temperature and such. It felt e were really attended properly and taken care of I love the service - I would cherish those moments for the rest of mylife it was surreal.
Going back I am now carrying my baby and I could see her face in full force, she's a beauty looks like her papa. Atleast that was I saw that time. We ordered mcDo large drinks, fries, spaghetti, burger and nuggets - this was like 9AM (because everything opens late due to COVID). We are not sure about the time cause we cant se the sunshine from our room we just depend on clock. So Iwas ahppy to annpunce my baby to family, I immediately send pictures to ma and sisters and pa while baby and her papa is sleeping in the couch ( me carrying the baby). It was dark, my husband turn the ligths off.

ll I remember was constant visites of nurses. We also ordered tagalog food all Grab by the way, my husband just gets the food from entrace of the hospital.anyway, It was difficult to get the liquid in my IV injected in my hand it was painful, but it's alrigth I guess it blocks the pain. I was happy that every 2 hours my baby wakes up and feed. it's automatic. My husband also carries her from time to time so so sweet moment and bonding. It was the time were I felt I am so much blessed. Even in pandemic, rather than worrying I embraced the moment of happiness and it's priceless. Also on the next morningwe were visited by doctors, Dr who latched my baby (guy who I only met after giving birth), OB and Pedia. We were adviced by Dra to go home on the 2nd day ( we spent 3 nights in total).
The total of the bill is 130K PHP but most of it were shouldred by HMO and Philheatlh. We only paid like 40K php cash. So maybe I'll insert pics here for your reference. But I really need to get sleep my baby might wake up na!

Thank you Lord for the gift of Family, my husband and my daughter. Thank you for saving us in COVID and keeping us sane and protecting us from worries and anxiety.
Thank you for embracing us with your unending love this I know for sure, we are safe in your arms. We lift to you Oh Lord our pains and worries. Thank you Lord for my beloved daughter, Eloise. She is the love of our lives (me and Jose) - we kep on saying upto know that she is the very good thing that ever happed to us (Ikaw and pinaka magandang nag yari sa buhay namin).

SALAMAT LORD.
MAHAL KA NAMIN.

Bye Dra

Hello I lost count of the days in quarantine. Maybe morehan a month already since ECQ, now it's called GCQ. This will definitely mark as one of the baddest history of our lives, I really hope we come out alive and healthy - I believe God will never abandon us and will protect us always.

So Im just here sitting in the room sipping ice coffee from Dunkin Donut, the most missed donut since ECQ started, while husband is working his ass off PS4 ingaaay!
Hello May Im 34.5 weeks pregnant!

A lot has happened yesterday, we fight because of. single careless call.

Just a disclaimer Im not hating it's just natural to react and fight back of what feels wrong especially now Im in the last trimester. Imagine how many jumble things are in my mind right now.
It's hard to deliver in times like this fucking covid plus ECQ , no checkup for morethan a month - and unresponsive OBGYN. You heard it, I have issues with my OB.

To begin with, my OB is my mom and sisters OB which means shes tried and tested thats why i was refered to her even she doesnt have HMO. She hates HMO which is a bummer on my part cause it really helps working class like us - a lot. To consider her is such a big decision knowing I have maternity HMO  package of 50k and I easily throw it off the window just to have her as OB. So here it goes...

On my second trimester, she went like "Im going states on April".. So I was shookt to the core like "Dra how about me, who will deliver the baby?" She goes "If im still here I will do it, if clinic renovation finished early Ill fly and Ill transfer you to my colleague in Delgado." On my mind I was worried but shrug it off my shoulder cause it looks like it's okay since her colleague is reliable. I asked her questions, the thing I dont like is we end up telling stories thats non pregnancy related. The truth is I really want to discuss my birth plan but we end up with something else. That time I was with my sister, she came with us(Jose) to ask when Dr (her pedia husband) will come home for Liam's checkup. Still, Faye went home empty handed, no concrete answer when the dr is coming back. Dra just said she'll message Faye etc., Okay there's nothing we can do about it - but then again she didnt refer.

Fast forward third trimester. I asked her if we can have 2 OB so I can use my HMO - she answered you can have new OB go for it. I got scolded by Mom and sis they want dra cause she's the best atleast they tried her. So Okay fine, told Dra I prefered her service over OB if thats ok, then asked if I can walk already in prep for delivery. She asked whens my due and said I can start Friday (May1).

So I walked in lessthan 15 min carpark on Friday with husband. After I finished thats when the dilemma started. I texted her "Dra Im done walking is 15 mins okay? and will there be any checkup before my delivery on May15"? She called, and I aswered right away.

I mentioned I felt sudden sakit puson when I walked and she said okay (like not interesting) then proceeded with the most tragic statement you could ever hear from your OBGYN.

"May ni-rerequire na na covid test for pregnant e, new protocol." She said. I was left aghast , like shocked of all "COVID TEST" imagine how many days I stayed home just to avoid exposure and now this she was referring testing hospitals like St Lukes and FE delmundo. OMG! Are you kidding dra?? Why? said it's protocol. Even Im shooked, I asked family members like ate chic who had her rapid test. Dra doesnt even know thers rapid testing. She said matagal pa result etc and she'll try to search for hospital. So I asked theres rapid testing results are given after 15 mins, and then she said it's ok. She called again and said I require chect xray - it was like stabbing words. DOC! Isnt harmfull for pregnant? She said no! okay what can i say shes the doctor. But I know for sure xrays are not good for pregannt I google a lot and heard so many stories of miscarriage or abnormalities because of xray. So I contacted Delgado, luckily my sister have landline she the questions for me and again I was shooked!!!' I asked Dra shall I get the test right away as in as soon as possible - she said yes! OMG why if my delivery date is May 15??? It feels suspicious so I contacted the hospital.

1.) It is not a requirement to get COVID test for pregnant but some OBGYN requires it. SO it's Dra who needs the negative result
2.) They only require Checst Xray - if i have symptoms - But again dra didnt even asked if I have cough or any flu like symptoms or runny nose - she just needs shest xray na parang ang dali dali nagyong ECQ!!
3.) Last but not the bombshell turning point of running out of my OB is that - she no longer affiliated in Delgado! OMG talaga how much more danger is she giving us?? Imagine laboring and she just found out she cannot practice in the hospital anymore ending is transfer din ako sa iba dba. BUKING tlga.

I mean she puts too miuch danger to my family. And she's not being honest and straightforward.
So I gotta say goodbye.

Nag away pa kame ng asawa ko because it really shookt us to the core. We are literally left with no words to describe it na ano iniisip ni Dra na we'll go to testing centers (cause she's saying na matagal pa result) at pumila together with PUI, PUM or positive??? How much more exposure a pregannt woman can get dba? So this is a clear NO NO!!! To take the test as early as now means it has nothing to do with delivery on May 15 kase I can be infected in between diba so what tests ulit pag nanganak nako?but the negative result she badly needs is just for her own safety , for the checkup that I badly needed cause we were not checked for morethan amonth na and it's too risky especially malapit nako manganak. I get it she needs to protect herself but be honest, you couldnt have said straight to my face it's not protocol but I need it cause Im senior - I would understand and probably would say no never mind we shall see on my delivery day nalang.

I end up talking to delgado and we agreed I will come on May 15  when GCQ is lifted to get my new OBGYN. But Im ready to deliver, wla na magagawa randon na tlga ang OBGYN na ma aassign k=saken since emergency.

Ending is walkin ako at I dont have OBGYN!

OKAY KALMA NA.

It's just a waste of time, waiting for un interested OBGYN I could have had new OBGYN if she released me right away.

A very bad decision to keep secrets of your status, like not affiliated and no birthplan.

And finally to be asked to be expose the decision is very bara bara. WE are talking about the life of my child, so please dont make me look like aso na kahit ano ipagawa mo kahit dangerous you expect us to do. PLease lang sa mga dr please be considerate and alamin mo muna yung condisiton tlga bago ka magpakasigurado na magpapa check kme sa mga COVID test centers baka pumunta kme negative pag labas namen positive na kame. We are not tanga naman. Sorry for the rant but it makes me angry everytime I remember the words she's uttering. To think na sabi ni Delgado we will have the test her during your delivery na, on the same dapat.

Sana maging honest din mga dcotors, pra naman we feel secure and assured hindi yung stress lang din nabibigay. Ayun lang I pray that she's okay cause it doesnt feel right lalo Im always the one texting no kamusta from her feels like she's not instresedt. di nya alam kelan due ko, di nya alam complete name ko so what do you expect, how the hell can I depend on her?

Sorry Doc, but I cannot continue with you anymore.

Thanik you for the time, especially the timing to get this baby - BUT I KNOW IT'S BECAUSE OF GOD NOT YOU. Like you said prang biro biro lng ito nuon - it hurts cause we are not kidding we are seriously wanting a baby, and I thank God for this wonderful blessing. So Doc tata!

xo,
Fran

New Post on Youtube About Social Isolation in TImes of Covid-19

Hello, Im in social isolation for 3 weeks straight!
Lord please let Covid go away, may my delivery go smoothly and may we not catch the virus Covid especially in Hospital.
Please protect our doctors, nurses and all the frontliners working in very high risk environments.
I especially pray for my OB GYN and nurses who will take care of us in Jose Delgado Hospital that they may have clear minds and brave hearts and fully bateled gear to protect themselves from Covid.
Also our driver and all the people we are going to come across when we go out when the time comes that I'll have contractions and that we already need to go to the hospital.

Also to my parents, sisters all my family spare us Lord please from Covid-19.
I pray that our scientists, doctors can find the vaccine for Covid.
Please Lord, please...

Love,
Fran

Pregnancy in Times of Covid

Im 28 weeks pregnant based on my calendar, exactly 13 days after Luzon lockdown. This is the longest days I stayed home, not even dared stepping out the door.

Even before lockdown, the tension is building up in the office at home, everybody in the whole world is waiting for the next country to be hit by Covid-19. Until one BGC employee got covid postive.
We know it's the start of community acquire covid, considering the fact that he has not travelled outside. I asked fellow mom in the office how their manager support pregnant in times like these. They were adviced to work from home. I asked my manager if this is possible, but she blocked it's not possible and only the head is the one who can permit pregnant to wfh. Just to give a brief background, my current manager is tyrant, who's side is always for the benefit og the company who doesnt give a fuck about the well being of her staff. So much more, she always pin points whenever there is fault, and always gets her way first to get what she doesnt need before us - you know like laptop and cellphone. She doesnt need it to be honest because she's only a manager who's not doing technical stuff but opt to have laptop and order desktop for us- her programmer and highly skilled staff, and now she made me use my personal laptop to be able to work from home (because taguig is lockdown already) , and will not pay for our internet or/and electricity bills, and would like me to re-use old headset (while she doesnt want me to burrow from my officemate because coming out of her mouth is unhygienic), and who also wants me to call AU and reimburse it later, who promises a lot but cannot/ will not fulfill atleast one - which makes her a hypocrite and a liar. In short I hate her to core, the only reason I make chuchu is because my mantra is "If you cant beat them , join them". She's one of the trusted leech in the uppermanagement who pays me, so I couldnt do more but to wait until the next opportunity comes. By the way she said im oncall during Maternal Leave - LOL the nerves of a witch.

Going back to Covid..

Before Covid 19, it was called Novel Corona Virus - a new virus that infects mostly the weak with underlying sickness and the seniors. But later on it became pandemic, some acquire it and doesnt show any symptoms or "asymptomatic" others experience dry couch, runny nose, sore throat, diarrhea and worse pneumonia. Some claims they started to lose sense of taste and smell.
China was first, Italay was second and now USA specifically NYC has become the epicenter of Covid 19 pandemic.

In lockdown - I spend most of my time working from home, so many issues. Then I cook for breakfast, and always the one washing the dishes. I love washing the dishes it makes me feel like Im washing off the virus. I was afraid that it might stick to things at home. Everytime my husband go for groceries, he wears mask and when he goes back I let him remove all his clothes and wash or take a bath. Lucky for us we leave below Robinsons grocery store and drugs store.

I support mama, I buy grocery for her and Jose and Frank carries it for her too.
Last Thursday was my 35th birthday - nothing much I just ordered  jollibee spaghetti and six pcs chicken joy, Pizza hut Supreme and DQ cake - all grab food. Papa is trapped in his work place - I hope he's okay. My father is a bit on his own now - he decides what he wants with little or no advice from us. I wanted him to go home before the lockdown = but because of his personality - he declines and now he's trapped. I just silently pray he will be okay. My sister Faye is with her family, Frank and Liam. Ma is with Mai, who's ofource stubborn and lazy so theres nothing much they can do but to wait for our support.

How I spend my days off work hours is ofcourse I watch news - what's happening to us and the world and fucking China giving us combo fuck! An also spend my time watching out to my family and friends and relatives. I always message them to keep me updated. I hope I can really help in times like these - but there is only little or nothing much I can since Im very much pregnant. To be honest Im afraid.. Afraid that it's not an ideal time and an ideal world for my Beanie. But I will just keep the faith and keep God updated of what I feel, I'll do my best and I know that My God will take care of the rest. Im afraid that this wont stop the soonest, that we may work from home longer, that we will be in quarantine for the next months and hospitals will get saturated with Covid patients infecting the hospital and becoming more risky for me to deliver the baby. I really pray that the medicine will get invented ASAP - I couldnt imagine that in just a snap our world will be put on hold and will be covered with uncertainty  - where are we going and until when are we going to be like this?

Lord, help the world heal.
Do not let covid take our lives, my family ma, pa , faye, mia, my baby, jose, liam frank and my beloved relatives and friends.
Lord give us the right doctor and hospital so that we may not get covid may it be in May or June.
I hope our resources are not infected too, like car, driver and the attendees in hospital.
I pray you help me in delivering my baby girl - hopefully I get HMO and normal delivery. If it is not Dra Abadilla, it's okay as long as Dra Sally Macapagal is not covid infected because she works in St Lukes. Lord please lift up all my worries, shield us protect us with your uneding grace so that we may live in peace in times of Covid.
You, my Lord is the most powerful of all and no one will ever beat you so much more this fear that I feel and as well as the pandemic.
I pray that my family - Jose  Beanie and I will live healthy and happily ever after.
Thank you Lord, I love you!

xo,
Fran

My Little Baby Girl

Hello World I just want to share with you my piece of heaven - Beanie, Franchesca, liit or kulit whatever we call her since we're still undecided of her name.

I know it's too early to say who she looks like. But I think my girl got moma's eyes. That time when we took CAS, I was laughing with Dra that's why she looks funny too. Nakikitawa with us.

xo-moma Fran

IG Post: A Message to my Pregnant Body and my Beanie

Im shy with my body but with baby in it makes me feel proud. 
I feel it serves its higher purpose being pregnant.
It's such a blessing to witness a bean with tiny beating heart has a life on its own and continuous to grow in my womb.

I love you my little girl.
Keep on kicking, momma loves it. <3 i="">
#happy23weeksbeanie

Movie Review 2020: Parasite

Why Parasite has become the best movie of 2019/2020.

Before I read the reviews from critics I wanted to share my opinion about this Korean movie.

It's mixed suspense, comedy and horror.

The content might have been tackled by some movie, being poor employed in a rich family and taking advantage of their masters.

They do it without holding back because there's nothing much to loose, no money not much of belongings so to have an opportunity to finally experience things that are impossible to possess is worth the pretends. It's innate in human being, like having the thrill or to experience things that makes us feel we're not caught in the middle of the act. You can look at the movie and react base on your life experience I think.

This family has nothing and would play a part to have a life that's too far from what they have. This is what they know and understood, and for them there's nothin wrong with it only that they need to not get caught.

They still have feelings, they wanted to feed the woman and her husband down the basement.

But the brother took it in his own hands, by bringing the stone down the basement to kill the captives and continue the life they longed for.

Since their father has no plans, he did it anyway. Unfortunately everything went wrong when the man downstairs has plans to get out too. I would call this double parasite, two sets of parasites wanted to live a dream that's being fed by gullible filthy rich family. So going back the plan went bad, it was a complete killing spree. What struck me most is that the father killed the owner "Mr Park" because the building up of insult plus the stress of loosing their home from flood was too much.

So in the end the father replaced the killer down the basement and I doubt if the son can pick him up since he always day dreams. Too bad the sister died to from the rampage.

Parasite is taking advantage of interesting things and wouldn't mind to do the extremes and make our mind set that everything is done in good intentions even if at the back of our head this is totally bullshit. But feels good if we pull it, right?

TBT August 2019 - NAIA Terminal 2 with Honoi

Today is laid back Saturday and I want to reminisce and share my recent travel to Hong Kong and Macau with hubby.

It wasn't as cold as expected, infact it's partly cloudy and heat is still on air in the month of August.

Photo he took the night before the flight. 

He's  trying the new camera we bought in Glorietta. 

This is our humble kitchen. Again he's trying camera filters.

We woke up around 3am, our flight is around 7-8am if I recall. 

It was fun seeing NAIA again.

Goodmorning Terminal 2

Nails, check! 

Love this though the glittered one is not obvious.

pila daw sya dun hihi

hello tapos na kame sa immigration

Isip what to showdown for brekky. 

Though we're not in the mood to eat we're too sleepy. 

Almost 2-3 hours lang ata sleep naming. 

Late na mag pack and super daldalan galore.

Coffee, passport and engaged na ako! Hihi

Kape cape is honoi

I like wearing glasses even if I only have stigmatism, so I borrowed his. 

Super taas ng grado kaya baba lang hehe. 

Kape pa honoi ko

Super antok pa sya.

misty

Sleepy bebe

Ang tagal ng plane

Hon, tingen sa taas kunyari stolen 

Nag remote

And we're boarding! Bubye Pinas, see you in a week :)