Hello 2026

 I guess this is the first entry for 2026. 

To begin with, just want to pat my back for being productive today.

-went to school to pay for last tuition fee for baby girl

-enrolled baby boy to KUMON for preK1, he will start tomorrow.

-watched movie in sm with both babies since its cinemalaya we saw "I'm Perfect" and finished it!

-bought toys boulder YOLO and blind bag keychain hello kitty for baby girl.

-bought 3 hats for 599 each stitch for our march disney (cheaper than if we buy in disney).

-had late lunch at Shakeys

-they had jungle slide as well while I post old pics from Mai's bday party while tagabantay to 2 kids.

- on the side also working on issues in the office.

But amidst all this I had anxiety maybe due to Dunkin Donut Vietnamese coffee I had after baby boys assessment. But then again I realized a lot of things. Back and forth - uncertainties and miscalculated steps, like repeating mistakes - but atleast I am aware now and cannot dig deeper if it gets uncofmrotable I disenaged. This is just one of the few drawbacks of wanting children and never really a partner after all the things that he made me do to myself.

I want to forgive myself for still being gentle amidst life's turbulence. I want to forgive myself that sometimes I caught myself betraying it for old ways- but atleast aware and can pull back. I want to forgive myself by being overwhelmed when things get too much to handle. Everything happening at the same time. I want to hug myself in the dark room, that I can come out and be renewed again. We can all clean ourselves after the mudslide and yes, everywaking day is a chance to renew ourselves and be better - one day at a time. Keep learning, pushing and be the kind of person I will be proud of... someday.

I jut hug my kids not them knowing my thoughts are drowning and only them can keep me afloat.

This is what I get for being risk taker, redflag magnet and bara bara. I just really need to let go and let it be. this I pray , Amen.

Thank you Lord.

xo,

Fran